Being a girl, it's easy getting trapped in the cycle of not knowing what to wear because you want to be cool but individual at the same time. Try being individual and an identical twin at the same time. Growing up it was matching jumpsuits and polka dot everything for this girl...and her twin. From the day I was born, I have never had an individual identity. This was ok with me for years, because I never was aware that my sister and I are two separate people. Having a twin sister, I thought it was required to dress the same and look the same.
It wasn't until I was about seven or eight when I figured out "hey I can be my own person". I think this idea occurred because I just moved to a new school and a new neighborhood and no one knew we were twins.
When I eventually got into middle school, I couldn't really afford all of the popular brands so I turned to wearing crazy patterns and bright colors. I had hair every color under the moon...times we never have to refer to..burn the evidence! After Middle school going into my freshman year in high school, I tamed down on the hair dye and bright colors and turned to calmer and more approachable outfits. Being under five feet until junior year had its limits. It was hard to find clothes that was in style and fit at the same time. My senior year in high school I was coming into my own and realizing that I really loved fashion and the culture with it. Just as I was figuring out my likes and dislikes, my family went through a tradegy. We lost my father unexpectedly and anything fashion or health realted didn't matter anymore. After my dad passed away, I gained thirty pounds and became depressed and trapped in my body. I wore clothes that covered my body and hid my insecurities, there was no type of self-expression at all.
This past summer I finally told myself to be happy and spend time on myslef, which is something I've never done. I found out being a girl is a lot of work. I had a revelation and new life style. I lost all the weight I gained, and then some. Finally I get to wear clothes I actually like and aren't covering every inch of my body.
I typically wear simple clothes and florals. I love people knowing that I'm easy to talk to and approachable. My clothes finally express who I am. I have crazy
My whole life I have been known as a "good girl". This label is not a bad one, but it has its limits sometimes. Whenever I branch away from my "good girl" clothing, people are shocked and don't know how to handle it. For my twenty first birthday I bought a leather (not real leather) jacket. This jacket holds a power and emotion within it that brings out my tough side. I feel brave and confident when I wear this jacket. These emotions are something that I have never felt before. Along with this jacket, I have started to wear more dark and "dangerous" items ooooooh aahhhhhh! These pieces of clothing are what I realized I like to wear. I feel comfortable and proud when I wear these pieces.
Going through all of these life events have really shaped not only my style but my character as well. My influences and organization skills come from different perspectives that many people my age don't understand. My life has changes as many times as my hair color and I have learned to bend and mold with it. My fashion expresses what is going on in my life at the time. I hate to admit how much Instagram and celebrities have influenced my style, but their influence is undeniable. Although some styles and fads I went through are embarrassing and need to never be remembered, I do not regret any of it. Through my life experiences and experiments I have become the person I am living through the style I gathered and I wouldn't want to change any part of my journey to get where I am now.
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